


Ain't no sunshine

by dlodle0



Category: NCIS
Genre: Angst, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:14:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24753778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dlodle0/pseuds/dlodle0
Summary: She said it every morning before they parted ways, a soft “Be safe” as her lips grazed his cheeks. He said it when on slow days, he would go to the coffee cart to get them both coffee before spending time with her in her office. He had all but shouted it to the entire office when he had kissed her cheek on valentines day in front of everyone. The worry that maybe she didn’t truly know had him bent over, hands pressed to his head.
Relationships: Ellie Bishop & Jacqueline "Jack" Sloane, Ellie Bishop/Nick Torres, Jethro Gibbs/Jacqueline "Jack" Sloane
Comments: 25
Kudos: 88





	Ain't no sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> Grab your tissues. I cried a lot writing this one. As always thanks to wannabebold for editing and also for being my cowriter for most of the Ellick and Tiva scenes.

After a late start due to what was supposed to have been breakfast before work with Gibbs, but ended up being breakfast alone due to a case, Jack was just taking off her coat to sit down when her cracked door swung open.

“Hey Jack? You got a minute?” Bishop asked as she stepped into the room. She stopped when she saw Jack still getting settled and her brow furrowed. “Late morning? You okay?”

“Everything is fine.” Jack assured with a smile, reaching for the file. “What am I looking for?”

Ellie let her have it, though she didn’t stop frowning. “We’re looking for a motive.This is Logan Fields. We found his wife, Petty Officer Ella Fields dead in their basement. Jimmy said it looks like blunt force trauma but-”

“He’ll know more after the autopsy.” Jack finished for her, moving to sit at her desk. “You think the husband did it?”

“I don’t know.” The answer was honest as Bishop sat across from Jack. “All of the neighbors insist he is a great guy but there’s just something about his reaction to finding her that just didn’t feel right.” Her phone buzzed and she hopped back to her feet. “Let me know if you find anything.” She called over her shoulder, already halfway out the door.

Jack watched her go before pulling out her glasses and starting to go through the file. She didn’t find much that contradicted what Ellie had told her and she sighed as she closed it. She booted up her computer and started searching various social media platforms for both the victim and her husband.

They looked happy enough at first glance. But the more she flipped through the pages, the more possible tensions became obvious. She ended up focusing on a young woman who was in most of the pictures with the couple.

Printing out one of the pictures, she took it downstairs to the team. Ellie and Nick were nowhere to be seen as she descended the stairs. Neither was Gibbs. She looked around as if the gray haired man would appear before approaching McGee. 

"Hey Jack. Find something?"

"Uh, maybe." She extended the photo to him. "Any idea who this is?"

He took it and nodded. "Yeah. That’s Katie Bryce, she's the couple's next door neighbor." He pulled up a document on his computer. "I can send you the witness statement." 

“No, don't worry about it.” She waved him off. “I’d like to speak to her myself. Can you send me the address?” She was already heading to leave and he called after her.

“Uh yeah. I can do that. Want some company?”

Jack turned, her eyes dancing and a smirk on her lips, “I’ve been doing this for years McGee, I can handle talking to a witness. But if you see Gibbs, tell him where I am.”

XXXX

The crime had occurred in a neighborhood nearly an hour from the Navy Yard. It was secluded and there was a good amount of space between each house. As Jack drove down the gravel street to the house, she saw someone glance out of the front window. As she parked in the driveway, the figure moved and the blinds snapped back into place. 

Jack frowned as she got out of her car. She approached the door with caution, trying to ignore the apprehensive feeling that was forming in her stomach. She knocked twice on the door. “Miss Bryce? I’m Special Agent Jack Sloane with NCIS.” She could hear movement inside the house. “Miss Bryce?” 

“Go away! I already told the cops everything I know!” 

“I know.” Jack stepped closer to the still closed door. “But it would really help us if you could talk to me too. Katie, I only want to help.”

“Please.” The younger woman was nearly in tears. “Please just go!” 

“Katie.” Jack kept her voice calm as she heard the panic rising in the other’s voice “Katie, if you let me in, I can help you. Whatever you’re afraid of, we can help.”

“You can’t.” The door swung open as a new voice sounded and Jack took a step back as she took in the scene before her. Logan Fields had one arm around Katie’s neck and a gun pressed to her temple. 

“I’m sorry!” Katie was trying her best to get out of his grasp. “I’m sorry! Nobody was supposed to get hurt! You have to believe me.”

“Shut up!” Logan growled and Jack reached for her gun at the woman’s whimper. Instantly his gun was on her instead. “Don’t even think about it. I’ll kill both of you right here.”

Jack raised her hands, keeping them where he could see them. “You don’t have to do this.” 

“You don’t know what I have to do.” His eyes flickered over her shoulder and then she heard what he did. A car barreling down the gravel road. She didn’t need to look to know who it was driving like that. Jack opened her mouth to try to continue to talk Logan down and felt rather than heard the gunshot as it tore through her.

Gibbs saw her fall and returned fire. He watched as Logan Fields fell to the ground dead and leapt out of the car, running to Jack’s side already balling up his jacket to press to her stomach. 

“Ow.. Cowboy.” Her hand was already covered in her own blood as she reached up to cup his cheek. 

“Hey.” He was relieved to have her attention, ”Hang on, Jack. Bishop!”

“I can’t get service,” came her distressed voice. I’m trying!”

“Jack, look at me. You hang in there. I cannot watch you die.”

“Then I think you’d better close your eyes, Cowboy.” Her voice was strained and apologetic as he pressed against her abdomen but she did her best to add as much tease into it as she could.

“Dammit Jack that is not what I meant.” He nearly growled at her. “You stay with me.” He could feel his stomach churning, his hands uncharacteristically shaking as he pressed harder. “Do not close your eyes.”

Her breathing was labored but she forced her eyes to stay open. There was the slamming of car doors and then she could hear the rest of his team, running towards them. Her eyes never left him. “Jethro, I-” She wasn’t sure he would be able to hear her over the sudden noise pouring in behind them.

His eyes snapped back to her the second she said his first name. She had only ever said it a few times but this time felt wrong. He cut her off before she could get any further. “I know. Just stay with me.” His eyes were pleading with her and her lips pulled into the tiniest smile before her eyes closed. 

XXXX

While he waited in the emergency room for any news, the words he knew she had been trying to say echoed in his mind. I love you. Neither of them had ever said it, both too afraid of the commitment it would bring. Instead they had said it in a million other ways. She said it every morning before they parted ways, a soft “Be safe” as her lips grazed his cheeks. He said it when on slow days, he would go to the coffee cart to get them both coffee before spending time with her in her office. He had all but shouted it to the entire office when he had kissed her cheek on valentines day in front of everyone. The worry that maybe she didn’t truly know had him bent over, hands pressed to his head. 

There was a rustle of fabric as someone sat next to him. Without looking he knew it was Ellie. Her hand found his shoulder, “She’s going to be okay, Gibbs.” The smell of coffee caught his attention and he looked up to see her holding a cup out. “I stopped at the coffee cart before I came in. I know you hate hospital coffee.”

As he took the cup, there was the sound of rushing footsteps coming towards them and Ellie stood protectively to block whoever it was from seeing Gibbs. But at the sound of the voice, he stood and put his hand on Ellie’s shoulder so she would stand down.

“What happened?” Vance barked as Ellie stepped aside. She didn’t go far in case Gibbs needed her. 

Gibbs threw his hands up in a shrug. “She caught a lead. I-I-” He ran his hand roughly down his face. “I was too late.” He was clearly struggling. “When he saw me pull up-” He cut himself off again and shook his head. He stormed off in the opposite direction of Vance, and Ellie spun on her heels to face the director.

“What do you know, Agent Bishop?”

Ellie pressed her lips together before sighing heavily. “It doesn’t look good. She lost a lot of blood and they’ve been in surgery almost two hours.” 

Just as she said that, a doctor started towards them and her attention immediately shifted. 

“Are you here for Jacqueline Sloane?” The doctor asked, looking between them. “We had a Jethro Gibbs as her emergency contact. Is he here?”

“I’m his daughter.” Ellie heard the lie fall easily from her lips before she could think. She saw Vance raise an eyebrow but he didn’t object, “He’ll be right back. Can we please see her?” 

“I’m sorry until I speak to Mr. Gibbs or a member of Miss. Sloane’s family, I can’t allow that.”

Ellie’s snarl of anger was cut short by Vance pulling out his ID and badge. “Agent Sloane works for NCIS. She was shot while going after a suspect, there’s nothing you can tell us?”

The doctor sighed as she looked at what Vance was holding out. She weighed her words in her mind before speaking. "I suggest you get her team in here. Just in case. I can let one of you in for now."

Ellie had already stepped away, calling Gibbs repeatedly to try to get him to return. She turned at the doctor's words, her eyes wide. "Director-" She knew he and Jack were close but she had to try. "Please."

Vance looked towards the room where they knew Jack was and after a long moment, he nodded shortly. "You keep me updated on any and all changes. Where are Agents McGee and Torres?"

"They should be at the office. They stayed with the body until Jimmy could get there."

"I'll call them." He told her as she headed towards the room. 

The sight of Jack laying in the hospital bed stole her breath for a second. She had never seen Jack look anything but perfect. She always had her hair done and makeup on and it was rare to see her without heels. But now… she looked so small and fragile.

Ellie crossed the room as quietly as she could, wiping hot tears from her cheeks. "Hey." She forced out as she pulled the chair as close as she could to the bed. "You gotta wake up. You're going to wake up." She took Jack's hand in hers, hoping to feel the warmth and strength that Jack so often radiated. "We need you. Gibbs needs you."

There was no answer and Ellie leaned down so her head was resting next to their hands on the bed as she began to pray. She hadn’t prayed much since she had moved out of her parents house but if there was ever a time that called for it, it was when one of their own was in the hospital.

That was how McGee found her when he got there about forty-five minutes later. “Ellie, have you seen Gibbs?” 

Ellie lifted her head to reveal red eyes and she shook her head. “Not since he took off away from Vance.” She sniffled once and took a deep breath. “McGee… I can’t lose anyone else.”

Tim looked at the ground, thinking of everyone he had lost throughout his years at NCIS: Kate, Paula, Jenny, Mike, Ziva (though he was more than relieved to find out she was actually alive) and Reeves were just a few he could think of. Now it looked like Jack would be the next name on his list. “Jack’s strong. She’ll pull through.” He attempted to sound confident but fell short. The younger agents looked at each other as the thought of her not recovering tore through both of them. “I gotta go find Gibbs.” 

“No you don’t.” Vance spoke from behind McGee startling both him and Bishop. “Agent Torres found him in her office. They’re on their way here now. How is she?”

“No changes.” Ellie was still holding Jack’s hand as she spoke, voice trembling. 

“Agent Bishop, you should take a walk. One of us will stay with her.” Vance said though his tone was not unkind.

Ellie shook her head and glared at him, challenging him to force her to go. “I’m not leaving her until Gibbs is here.” 

The man in question along with Nick arrived at the hospital in record time. The doctor tried to argue that only one or two of them could be in the room at a time and it took Nick, McGee and Ellie to hold Gibbs back.

In the end, the five of them were all in the room. Ellie gave up her seat for Gibbs and sat with McGee and Nick on the couch by the window. Vance was leaning against one of the walls but their heads all snapped up when they heard the weak thread of her voice.

“You’re here.” Her eyes scanned the room and paused on Ellie’s tear stained cheeks before going back to Gibbs. 

“Course we are.” He answered her, lifting her hand to his mouth to give it a kiss. Her eyes fluttered closed again and he tightened his grip. 

“Can you give us a minute?” Though she didn’t open her eyes again, the team knew she was speaking to them and slowly they filed out, Ellie last in line and closing the door behind them. As soon as it closed, she lifted a heavy hand to his cheek, “My Cowboy. I'm sorry...” She struggled to open her eyes as she said it. 

He knew what she was doing and more than anything, he didn’t want to have this conversation. Everything in him wanted to turn and run. Run until all of this was so far behind him that it would never catch up. It took everything in him to stay seated, pressing closer to the bed. His face turned into her hand instinctively, pressing a kiss to her palm before he held it back against his cheek. “Jack… Nothing to be sorry for." He assured her, Those words held everything he longed to say, Please don’t go. Stay with me. I can’t lose you. He knew it was his last chance to say it. “Jack, I love you.”

Just like that morning, her lips pulled into a smile and then all at once she was gone. He could hardly hear the alarms going off in the background as hospital staff flooded the room. They moved him out of their way to a corner of the room as they tried to save her but he knew that no matter what they did, Jack was gone. 

When all of the medical team had left, his team filed in silently. He didn’t need to speak, one look and they knew. Ellie tucked herself under Nick’s chin, crying softly into his chest. McGee stepped forward, “Let me drive you home, Boss.”

XXXX

It had been three days since they had been in the office. Three days since Jack had died. It was the minimum amount of time that Vance had insisted his team take before returning. Gibbs sipped his coffee as he waited for the elevator to reach his floor. He could feel the looks of every agent he passed and more than once he saw someone stop their coworker from getting on the elevator with him. He rubbed his eyes exhaustedly as the elevator dinged and he stepped out.

Almost immediately after stepping out of the elevator he froze at the sight of golden waves. He felt two people bump into him but he didn’t move, still staring at her back. He blinked rapidly trying to clear his vision and convince himself he was only dreaming but the sight didn’t change. He started moving slowly, memories of Jack turning around to greet him and seeing that smile that was able to light up the darkest of rooms. He was almost begging in his mind for her to turn so he could see it.

McGee looked up as he moved into the bullpen “Boss?” and at last the blonde turned.

“Gibbs?” Ellie’s voice was full of concern as he stopped just short of her. His hand clenched his coffee cup tighter as he realized his mistake. Her hand reached out and he pulled back, wondering how many times the sight of Ellie would remind him of Jack. He could see it even now with her sad smile and worried eyes.

“I thought…” He shook his head and sat down at his desk. Ellie was shaking as she realized what it was that he had thought and she turned her back to the rest of the team.

McGee and Nick exchanged a worried glance as Gibbs looked around, feeling lost. This was all wrong. All of it. The walls were too bright, the sound of the other agents moving around the office was too loud. He stood up and slammed his hands on his desk, catching the Director's attention as he crossed the mezzanine in front of the MTAC sign. 

Vance looked down to take in the very aggravated looking Gibbs. "Agent Gibbs, is there a problem?"

“Not ready.” He said roughly as he headed back towards the elevator. 

Vance gave a short nod of understanding and turned to the rest of the team. Nick had his hand on Ellie's back and he was speaking softly in Spanish. Ellie nodded to whatever he had said and Nick glanced at the director. "Sir…"

"Go home. I don't want to see any of you for at least the next two weeks. Is that understood?" 

The three agents nodded and Nick helped Ellie grab her things. Following McGee, they walked into the elevator, air heavy around them as they pressed the button for the parking lot. Ellie was curled into Nick’s side and McGee was reminded of finding Tony and Ziva in a similar position after Franks was killed. Gibbs had understandably been broken up about his friends death but he hasn’t seen him like this since Jenny.

“What McGee?” He looked at Nick in curiosity, silently asking him for clarification. “You said something about not seeing him like this since Jenny.” Letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding McGee filled them in. 

“Jenny Shepard. She was the Director of NCIS before Vance. Before that though she and Gibbs had been partners, working undercover together. I think he loved her, she was the one that got away…” He trailed off, remembering the interactions he caught between Jenny and Gibbs. 

“What happened between them?” Ellie’s voice was barely loud enough but he heard her.

“We never knew what but something definitely happened between them when they worked undercover together as agents. Then when she became Director you could see the tension between them… She was killed in a shootout in Los Angeles 12 years ago. Needless to say Gibbs didn’t take it too well.” 

“I remember them talking about that in FLETC, it was right before I became an agent. Man, I never realized you guys were close to her.” The elevator opened then and they stepped out, walking to their cars. 

“Yeah, everyone took it pretty hard. I just hate to see history repeat itself.” Arriving at his car McGee leaned against the door, watching the two younger agents. The team had been torn apart last time, he was just glad they all had someone to lean on now. “Go home you two. Get some rest.”

Ellie started to walk away as Tim got into his car but was stopped when Nick grabbed her arm.

"Come on, I'll take you home, Ellie. We can pick up your car later."

"Yeah. Okay." Her voice was despondent and she followed listlessly behind him as they left. 

Nick waited until they were almost at her house before he spoke. "What's wrong?"

"Huh?" Ellie's gaze shot up to him and she felt her face warm with shame. "It's- it's nothing, Nick. Don't worry about it." 

His hand found her thigh as he parked. "El, come on. It's just me. Let me in."

Ellie crumbled in the seat beside him. “He thought that I was Jack…” She hiccupped and his hand reached for hers. “Did you see how he looked at me when he realized I wasn’t? It was like he had seen her ghost. He can’t even look at me. What if- What if that happens every time?” She was sobbing by the end of her sentence and Nick could barely understand her. But he had caught enough. 

In response, Nick got out of his Jeep to come around to her side. He opened the door and leaned over to unbuckle her. Once he had done so, he quickly tugged Ellie out of the Jeep and into his arms. “Ellie. You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s not your fault.” Her tears soaked through his shirt as they stood, swaying slightly in the parking lot. Once she had calmed down a little bit, he was able to get her inside and he held her on the couch until Ellie fell asleep against him. 

XXXXX

Nick gave Gibbs a few days to calm down, though he kept in contact with McGee to make sure their boss was okay. Coming through the front door, he immediately made his way down to the basement where he knew his boss would be. Stopping at the bottom of the stairs he couldn’t help but stare. Gibbs was leaning against a boat that he had obviously just recently started building with a small mason jar in hand full of what he assumed was bourbon. What he had started of the boat sat in the middle of the room in perfect condition but the rest of the basement was demolished, broken pieces of wood, tools and glass on the floor. He was sure It was the perfect image of what Gibbs must feel like after Jack’s death. 

Since Gibbs still hadn’t looked up he cleared his throat, stepping down into the room and picking up a glass to drink with him. For the first time in two weeks he really looked at the man in front of him. He had only seen Gibbs cry once before, at the hospital when he broke the news, but it was clear that he hadn’t truly stopped since. He looked so much older than usual. Taking a sip of liquid courage he almost spoke up until Gibbs beat him to it. 

“What’re ya doing here Nick?” Having Gibbs call you by your first name was rarely a good thing and he gulped, knowing this conversation was going to cause the man more pain but it couldn’t wait. 

“It’s Ellie.” He finally looked up at hearing his female agent’s name and Nick continued. “She’s uh, she’s pretty upset about what happened last week. She’s afraid that she reminds you too much of Jack and you won’t be able to look at her, let alone work with her, anymore.”

Sitting down the now half-empty glass on the boat Gibbs ran a hand over his face. Pulling over the make-shift stools he motioned for Nick to sit before taking one himself and looking up at him for the first time since he arrived. 

“Yeah. Yeah, she reminds me of her. Some days Bishop looks more like Jack’s daughter than Faith does.” He chuckled lightly at that, remembering one time he and Jack had taken Ellie to lunch and been mistaken for her parents. He would never forget the look of pride that flooded Jack’s face when she had looked at Ellie in that moment or how her hand had tightened on his when the waiter left.

“Yeah, Ellie told me they thought she was Jack’s daughter at the hospital.” Nick’s words sobered Gibbs and he remembered why they were talking about this now. He seemed to notice the change in mood and got back to why he was here. “Look Gibbs, I know this is a difficult time for you right now, I mean, I can’t imagine what I would be like if that was Ellie but, I needed to come here to make sure everything would still be okay between you two. She sees you like a father ya know.” Gibbs took a deep breath, taking in everything Nick had told him. 

“It won’t be easy seeing her every day but I won’t push her away. Pretty sure Jack would come back and kill me if I did.”

Nodding, Nick downed the rest of his bourbon and sat the glass down on the workbench, feeling Gibbs eyes on him the entire time. “Well, I’ll let Ellie know everything is gonna be okay between you two.” He started making his way up the steps when Gibbs' voice stopped him mid-stride. 

“Hey Nick?” 

“Yeah Gibbs?” Taking another drink he looked at his agent, making sure he had his full attention. 

“Don’t make the mistakes I’ve made. Tell her, before it’s too late.” 

Swallowing back his emotions, Nick just nodded, letting out a quiet “copy that” before making his way up the stairs. Once at the top he pulled his phone out, opening up the rideshare app and requesting the closest car. About to turn off his phone he paused, looking at Ellie’s face that was his background. Opening his text messages he pulled up her name, typing out a quick message: 

_Everything’s gonna be okay El. I really think you should come by Gibbs tomorrow and talk. Be home soon. I love you._ Hitting send he smiled, thankful that Ellie did know how he felt and promising to tell her those three little words every day for the rest of their lives. 

  
  


XXXX

That night Gibbs was able to have his first mostly full night of sleep since Jack had passed. He jolted awake to the smell of coffee coming from the kitchen. He made his way downstairs and was unsurprised to see Ellie standing by the stove. She turned to him as he stopped in the doorway and offered him a small, nervous smile. “Gibbs…”

He didn’t give her the chance to speak, crossing the room and pulling her close. He pressed a firm kiss to her temple. “Not your fault.”

Her hands grabbed tight to the back of his shirt. “Can I stay with you?” Her voice let on that she was hurting more than he had imagined and he nodded, not letting go.

“Whenever you need.” 

XXXX

Two days later, he was downstairs working on the boat when he heard the sound of little footsteps above him. Though Tim and Delilah had brought the kids over a few times, he was sure it wasn’t them. He hadn’t had enough time to think of who it could be when the basement door opened. Tony stood at the top of the stairs. “Boss.”

“Not your boss, DiNozzo.” Despite everything going on, he was glad to see that Tony looked like he was happy. There were new laugh lines around the corners of his mouth and his arm was around the waist of Ziva as they looked down at him.

“Gibbs.” Ziva spoke from beside Tony, holding tight to Tali’s hand as she struggled to free herself from her mother’s grasp. “How are you?”

“Ima, let go!” Tali insisted and Gibbs gave her a nod. The next second, Tali was racing down the stairs and into his arms. “Grandpa Gibbs!” She jumped at the last second and he caught her with a quiet groan. “Are you okay?”

“Better now.” He answered Ziva with a hint of a smile as he shifted Tali in his arms. “Hey kid! Course I am.” He lied to her, “Why do you ask?” 

Tali gave him the tightest hug her little body could muster. “Abba said you’re sad but I’m here to give you all the snuggles you need.”

He hugged her back as he looked at her parents again, “Who called you?”

“I did.” As Tony and Ziva started to make their way down to the basement, Ellie poked her head in. “I thought all the love and support you could get would be best right now.” 

He didn’t let go of Tali as he hugged each of her parents with his other arm. “Come on. Don’t need to be down here.” 

The group headed up the stairs and as they did, Tali piped up excitedly from his arms. “Plus Ima says we have to move soon before the baby comes!” 

Once upstairs Tali jumped onto the couch, pulling Gibbs to sit next to her as Ziva took the other side of him.

“Tali!” Ziva chided gently. “I thought Abba and I told you that was a secret.” 

Tali leaned her head into Gibbs’s shoulder. “Sorry Ima…”

“No.” Gibbs spoke gently, “No don’t be sorry.” He was looking at Ziva, “How far along are you?”

“Eleven weeks and two days.” Her hand grazed over her abdomen but she was still frowning slightly.

“Boss, we didn’t want to say anything until after…” Tony gestured widely. “It didn’t feel right.” 

“Not your boss.” He said again before shaking his head. “Jack would have been happier than anyone to know there is going to be a new baby in the family.”

“We wish Tali could have known her better. She was an amazing grandmother, but we know it would have been better if we were here.” She sent a soft smile to her husband sitting across from them as she leaned her head on Gibbs shoulder, trying to comfort him. “We um, will be moving back Gibbs. Maybe not to DC but in the area. After everything that has happened Tony and I decided we would like to raise our children around our family.” 

“Can’t wait to have you back Ziver.” Leaning over he placed a kiss on top of his surrogate daughter’s head. “You too DiNozzo.” Tony nodded in silent understanding as they all shared a moment before Tali climbed onto Gibbs’ lap. 

“What about me Grandpa Gibbs?” 

A much needed laugh escaped him as he wrapped his arm around his granddaughter, holding onto her tight and placing a kiss on top of her unruly curls. “And you too kid.”

Gibbs sat there between two of his favorite girls, soaking up their love and the warmth they brought back to his home as Tony talked about their newest family member and their plans for the future, paying no attention to Ellie exiting the room.

  
  


Ellie disappeared into the office down the hall as the trio continued to talk about the family’s plans to move back to DC. Though neither of them would be rejoining the agency, they had decided that being so far away no longer felt right. The conversation was interrupted a few minutes later by Ellie coming back out of the office slowly, her eyes meeting Gibbs as she did.

“I- I found this.” She held out the stack of envelopes and he took them, flipping through them. There was one for each of his current team members plusi him and Vance, their names penned in her perfect handwriting. He flipped through them and the last envelope in the stack made him pause. He swore under his breath and Tali looked up from where she was sitting in his lap.

“Grandpa Gibbs! That’s not a nice word!” He sighed as she pouted at him. “You’re not ‘posed to say that!”

“I know.” He told her, still looking down at Faith’s name. He could feel Ziva and Tony looking at him curiously and he shifted Tali onto the couch next to him. “Bishop.” He showed her the letter and she nodded. 

“Tali, do you want to see something really cool?” She pulled out her phone to distract the girl as Gibbs slipped away. 

He went upstairs to his bedroom and found Jack’s phone on the nightstand. He had no memory of bringing it or any of Jack’s personal things home from the hospital and he said a silent thanks to McGee for remembering. He tried turning it on, growing frustrated when it didn’t light up. He found the charger she had always left, still plugged in and connected it. He waited a few minutes before trying again and the phone booted. 

The background was a picture of them from almost a year ago at a poker night. She was leaning over him, her arms wrapped around his neck from behind as she laughed. His smile was rivaling hers. He forced himself to focus. There were multiple missed calls, mainly from his team the day she died but the notification that caught his eye was a text from Faith. His finger hovered over the conversation before he opened it. 

**Coffee date soon?**

He stared down at the date on the screen, kicking himself. It had been sent the day after she died. He had been meaning to reach out to her but hadn’t been able to bring himself to. He thought for a moment before slowly texting back. 

**Tomorrow morning?**

The answer was immediate. **I can be there at 8. Same place?**

He hated texting and even more than that, he hated that he was leading Faith to believe he was Jack. But he refused to tell her over something as impersonal as a text. **Yup.** With that he gently placed the phone back where it had been sitting before heading back down to his family. 

XXXX

When Gibbs arrived a few minutes before eight the next morning, Faith was already there. Her brow furrowed in confusion when she saw him and she leaned as if looking for Jack to come in behind him. He closed the distance between them quickly, sliding into the chair across from her.

“Agent Gibbs, I- I’m sorry but what are you doing here?” She looked out the window again and his eyes followed her, desperate to see what he knew she was looking for. “Where’s Jack? She was supposed to meet me.”

He pulled Jack’s dark phone from his pocket and set it on the table, setting off another slew of questions from Faith. “Is that her phone? What are you doing with her phone? What’s going on?”

He exhaled heavily. He had done this countless times in his job, for Marine and Navy personnel as well as for multiple agents throughout his time at NCIS. It was always hard when he was close to them but this time he truly didn’t know how to say it. 

He was still fighting down his emotions when he saw in Faith’s eyes that she had a suspicion of what he was going to say and her hand covered her mouth. “No…” She whispered and he knew it was now or never.

He stared at a spot on the wall above Faith’s shoulder as he spoke. “Agent Jacqueline Sloane was killed two weeks ago while on duty.” His voice sounded detached even to him.

Faith shook her head, calling him out on it immediately. “Don’t. Don’t say it like she was nothing to you. I know better than that. You think I don’t know what you were to each other? I’m her _daughter_. What happened?” 

He brought his eyes to hers and when he saw her tears, he felt his own dampen. “She was shot last Tuesday. She died at Bethesda later that night.” He left out the details wanting to spare her as much pain as he could.

They sat in silence for a while so Faith could have time to take everything in. She cried for a while before lifting her head. “Is there- Was there a funeral- a service- anything?” 

Gibbs shook his head. “She asked to be cremated and have her ashes spread in California. Our family is taking the trip next week.”

“I’m coming.” Her words were forceful as if she expected him to fight her on it. 

Instead he gave her a simple nod. “Agent McGee will get you the information.” He stood up. “And Faith?” He waited until her dark brown eyes, the one she had gotten from her mother, lifted. “I’m sorry.”

XXXX

Vance was able to pull some strings and get them a private jet to travel out to San Diego. He and Palmer were going to catch a later flight out and join them before they spread her ashes the next day.. Gibbs was helping Tali with a puzzle and he looked past her to see the rest of the family. Ziva was dozing on Tony’s shoulder as the former senior field agent flipped through a magazine and chatted quietly with McGee.

Not far from them, Ellie had her legs in Nick’s lap as she watched something on her phone, every once in a while opening her mouth so Nick would give her a cheeto. She glanced up at her phone and caught him looking at her. She smiled a little and raised an eyebrow, a silent question.

He shook his head and his eyes traveled to the person in the very back of the plane, all alone. Tali could tell he wasn’t paying attention to her anymore and she made a face as she looked. 

“Grandpa?” 

“Hmm?” He pulled his eyes from Faith to focus on his granddaughter. 

“Who is that?” She pointed at Faith and he reached out to lower her arm before the blonde could notice them.

He weighed his words carefully as his granddaughter came around the table so she was between his knees, looking up expectantly. “That’s Faith. She’s Grandma Jack’s daughter.” 

He had just finished his sentence when Tali slipped out of his arms and towards the back of the plane. 

Faith had her headphones in and her laptop open in her lap in an attempt to look busy. She was the outsider of the traveling group and the flight alone was making that perfectly clear. She felt the seat next to her dip and raised her eyes to see the little girl in next to her. She pulled out her headphones. 

“Hi!” Tali said as she leaned over to see the screen of the laptop and her little face split into a smile. “That’s Grandma Jack!” She said excitedly and then her concerned eyes turned to Faith. “Grandpa Gibbs said she was your Ima.” 

“I’m sorry?” 

“Ima means Momma.” Tali corrected herself, realizing her mistake. “She was your momma.”

Faith felt tears prick her eyes and she blinked, shifting her gaze back to the laptop where she had Jack’s facebook pulled up. She had spent the better part of the last three hours since they had left DC looking at any pictures she could find. Most of the more recent ones she had found were of Jack and her coworkers. They were almost always laughing and smiling and Faith felt a pang of regret when she realized that they didn’t have any together, other than the one of her as a baby. “She was.”

“Are you sad she went away?” Tali was still leaning on her, looking at the picture of Jack. She reached out and hit the next button so a new picture popped up. Tali kept talking, “One time my Ima went away but she came back.” 

Faith bit back a whimper at the young girl’s words, answering a minute later. “I don’t think Jack is going to come back.”

XXXX

The next day, early in the morning, the group set out to board a boat that would take them to Sunset Cliffs. It took three cars to get them all there. The group split up into who they intended to ride to the dock with. When Gibbs and Faith were the last two without a group, Gibbs grabbed the keys to the rental car and drove in silence. When they parked, looking out at the dock, Faith hesisted and he turned to her. “Faith.”

“I’m okay.” Her voice was tight but she nodded, watching the rest of the group head down to the water, “I just need a minute.” 

He glanced at the wooden urn he had made to hold Jack’s ashes between them and she shook her head. “You can take her. I’ll be right there.” He nodded and got out. As he walked down the dock, he glanced back to make sure she was okay.

Faith had her forehead pressed to what seemed to be a picture and he felt guilty for intruding on her moment. He boarded the boat, greeting the captain with a short nod. The ride out to the spot they had agreed on was short and he held the urn the entire way. He traced where he had craved her name into the wood with a heavy sigh.

The boat stopped and the door to the cabin of the boat opened. “Jethro. Whenever you’re ready.” 

He raised his head at the familiar voice. “Don’t think I ever will be, Duck.” Still he forced himself to get up and follow his old friend. Everyone was waiting for them and they parted so Gibbs could stand against the railing. He stood between Ellie and Faith, his agent laying her head on his shoulder.

Ducky spoke again from behind him. “I think that before we say our final goodbye to Jacqueline, we should all say something kind about her.” The group nodded in agreement. He decided to start them off. “From the very day Jacqueline set foot in our office, our lives were all destined to change. She brought a light into the office that we so desperately needed.” He motioned at them to keep it going and Ellie spoke first. 

“I loved getting lunch with her or whenever we had girls night.” She wiped her eyes with a soft laugh. “It sounds dumb but Jack helped me through more than I think she even knew.” 

Nick gave her a gentle squeeze when her voice cracked and he took the chance to go next. “She always knew when to push me to open up and when to let me deal with things on my own.”

“I only had the privilege of meeting her in person once. She helped me return to my family and for that I will always be grateful. But, even then I could tell she loved all of you, especially you, Gibbs.” Ziva placed a hand on his arm in comfort and nudged Tony. 

He took his hint, eyes on their former boss, “I only got to know Jack at first because she had to come over and help Gibbs set up the video calls.” There was a soft chuckle from the group. “But then she started staying around for our chats and I could tell she fit in the family perfectly.”

Tali, in that innocent way of only a child, cried out, “I loved that she always sent me lollipops!” There was a even stronger laugh at that before McGee started,

“Even if we didn’t know it then, Jack came to us when we needed her most. She helped me through a lot after we came back from Paraguay and I will always be thankful to her for that.” He got choked up a little at remembering when he first talked to her only a week after her arrival about Paraguay and would forever remember how comforting she was. 

Vance was quiet as he spoke, “Jack was one of those people who could teach you more about yourself in five minutes than you could learn in a year on your own. She certainly did with me.”

Faith realized it was only her and Gibbs left and started off slowly. “My mother and I, we were just getting started. She was... “ She cleared her throat, trying not to cry again. “I’m glad she had you all.” 

She looked at Gibbs as he was the last one left and he shook his head, refusing to speak. Whatever he felt didn’t need to be said, that was between him and Jack. He took one last look at his family, making sure they were ready before he turned the urn over, letting the ashes fall into the water. 

XXXX

After the boat ride, the team headed to a nearby beach to spend the rest of the day in Jack’s honor. Gibbs was walking along the shoreline, thinking of all the times Jack had mentioned wanting to visit San Diego and all of the time he had almost offered to accompany her. He looked out at the sea and waved back at Tali as she waved to him from the surfboard that Tony was helping her stand on. He was so distracted that he didn’t hear Faith come up beside him.

“Thank you for letting me join you.” She whispered. “I know that I didn’t know her-”

He held up a hand cutting her off. “You’re her daughter. Wouldn’t be the same without you here.”

"I just always thought we'd have more time." They stayed silent for a moment before Faith laid a hand on his arm, making sure she had his attention. “You need to know that she knew.” Faith whispered. “She knew you loved her.”

“Doesn’t mean I shouldn't have said it before. She deserved to hear it.” 

Faith took his hand and gave it a tight squeeze. “She already knew and she loved you too.” 


End file.
